Last night I caught up with Lecretia over FaceTime and she was looking really well, having just been out for dinner with her parents in Tauranga. It’s clear that the nadir of the chemo cycle has passed. It was worrying because you’ll recall that during Easter we had a trip to Tauranga Emergency Department after she’d collapsed. With any of these things you wonder whether it’s the drugs or the affliction and what the new normal is.
The big news of the day though was mine. As of this morning I am now on leave from work indefinitely. This is probably well overdue. Lecretia, though lucid, smart as a whip, and in good humour, requires a lot of assistance in getting around. She can’t really be left on her own as if she falls she’s not able to get herself up again, and she can’t prepare food et cetera. Up until now, I’ve relied on a delicate juggling act of friends, family, and Lecretia’s colleagues at the Law Commission to help look after Lecretia and to enable me to do my job, but it was increasingly clear that it was getting tougher and tougher for me to do that. So now it’s time for me to be there for her full time.
The company I work for has been amazing, and once I explained what was happening, they offered to give me leave and to hold a job open for me while we go through this next phase. When I return, depending on the length of time, it may not be the same job, as the company changes so much, but it will be a job nevertheless. Given I work for one of the most exciting companies in the country it’s a real relief I won’t have to re-earn a place there. I’ll be forever grateful to them.
So the question for us is – what now? Where once we were limited by available annual leave, finances, and Lecretia’s health, we’re now just limited by two of those things. If Lecretia were well enough, we could consider a world trip, but sadly I don’t think she is quite well enough. Lecretia would like to go to India, but I am terrified of attempting to help her through the crowded city streets of Delhi, with her half-blind and limping slowly on her good leg and yelling at me to help her find a bathroom. I am trying to persuade her that a holiday somewhere in the South Pacific might be nice, where we can lay up on a beach in the sun and someone can bring me ridiculous cocktails with fruit salads of garnishes attached while she tans herself or floats in the lagoon. I did suggest a road trip around NZ as a friend of mine is currently doing, but she replied on FaceTime last night, “I don’t like road trips.”
Anything we do is also limited by the chemotherapy cycle, which requires us to be at Wellington hospital for one day every three weeks, and the aftermath of that cycle, which seems to take about a week to pass. We also have Lecretia’s hearing of course, which is likely to come before the court next month. The reality is that over the next while we might get a few small trips away but we will more likely be at home for most of the next two months. What I’m hoping is that Lecretia’s health holds out so that we do get a decent holiday after the hearing. If you have holiday ideas for people with mobility issues I’d love to hear them. Fingers crossed we get the chance to take some of those ideas up.